Though parents don't like to think about it, their students sometimes make mistakes and get into trouble. If your student has had to enter the student conduct process, it can be a stressful and heightened experience for everyone involved. Below are some ways you can help your student not only get through the conduct process, but learn and grow from the experience as well.
How to Help Your Student Through the Conduct Process
- Speak with your student regarding the situation. Make sure that you listen carefully and critically.
- Have an open discussion with your student about the process of making decisions that are consistent with their values, personal code of ethics, and future goals.
- Assist your student in taking responsibility for their actions and avoid blaming others for the consequences that resulted from their choices.
- Make sure your student knows clearly what you expect and what you value.
- Remember that your student will look to you as a role model for dealing with and responding to conflict.
- Be open to discussing difficult topics, such as substance abuse, intimate relationships, and other risky behavior when your student has been accused of violating the Virginia Tech Student Code of Conduct.
- Make sure your student knows the conduct process. Your student should review the Hokie Handbook.
- Discuss with your student your expectations for his or her behavior at Virginia Tech. Discuss ways your student can modify his or her behavior to meet those expectations.
- Brainstorm with your student appropriate resources for help and support (e.g., alcohol education, personal counseling, etc.).
- Let your student know where you stand regarding his or her behavior, while continuing to support him or her emotionally.
- Brainstorm with your student ways to overcome past mistakes.
- Be firm in your approach, but always keep the lines of communication open.
- And remember, when there is an issue ask the three questions (in order) located in "How can I help my student?" before you call our office.